The one where the Valeyard is revealed to be the Doctor’s evil future self, Glitz returns to cause trouble, and the Matrix becomes less “cool sci-fi” and more “cheap BBC funhouse.”
Short Synopsis
The Doctor’s trial reaches its climax: the Valeyard is unmasked as a twisted version of the Doctor, Glitz gets bribed with secrets, and everyone runs around the Matrix in a surreal showdown that’s as confusing as it is ambitious.
Extended Storyline
At this point in the trial, the Doctor is looking more doomed than a redshirt in a Dalek convention. The Valeyard has accused him of genocide (Vervoids, never forget), the Inquisitor looks like she’s seriously considering throwing away the gavel, and even the courtroom audience (that’s us) has lost the will to live. But just when things couldn’t get worse — they do.
The Master suddenly hijacks the trial feed like a cat that’s figured out Zoom. He gleefully announces that the Valeyard isn’t just some random prosecuting lawyer with an evil grin — he’s actually a future incarnation of the Doctor, distilled from all the darkness in his soul. Yes, the Doctor is literally on trial against himself, which feels like the Time Lords finally admitted what fans already suspected.
The Doctor, predictably horrified, calls shenanigans. The Valeyard, predictably smug, doubles down and promptly scarpers into the Matrix — the Gallifreyan virtual reality system that turns legal battles into low-budget fantasy obstacle courses. The Doctor, because he has nothing better to do than chase his own evil alter ego through a dreamscape, follows him in.
The Matrix is less “futuristic digital realm” and more “whatever props the BBC had lying around.” One minute the Doctor is wandering through a Victorian courtroom corridor, the next he’s being attacked by harlequins, quicksand, and an office clerk who seems deeply annoyed to be in the story at all. The Valeyard taunts him at every turn, clearly enjoying the chance to ham it up without Colin Baker’s coat competing for attention.
Meanwhile, outside the Matrix, the trial continues. Glitz is dragged in as a witness, because why not bring back everyone’s favorite space conman? It turns out the High Council of Time Lords hired him to help cover up the whole Ravalox affair (Mysterious Planet callback, check). They basically moved Earth across the galaxy, deleted evidence, and thought nobody would notice. The Valeyard, however, is determined to expose the corruption — mainly so he can seize power himself. Think of him as the whistleblower who also sets the building on fire.
Inside the Matrix, the Doctor faces one surreal death trap after another. At one point, he’s menaced by a massive wind machine. At another, he’s chased through a Dickensian office where legal paperwork literally attacks him. It’s half horror story, half bureaucratic satire — and somehow still less stressful than real-life paperwork.
The Master reappears to meddle, of course, claiming he’s only helping the Doctor because he wants the Valeyard destroyed first. In reality, he’s clearly enjoying the chaos. Glitz bumbles between betraying the Doctor and trying to make a profit, proving once again that you can never trust a man in pinstripes in space.
Eventually, the Doctor confronts the Valeyard in a final showdown that involves lots of shouting, some explosions, and enough technobabble to make your ears wilt. The Valeyard tries to unleash an energy wave that will kill everyone in the courtroom, but the Doctor manages to redirect it, saving the day. The Valeyard, of course, isn’t destroyed — he’s last seen cackling in the shadows of the courtroom, because evil future selves don’t go down that easily.
Back in the trial chamber, the High Council is exposed as corrupt, the Inquisitor calls the whole proceeding a mistrial (probably because she’s as exhausted as we are), and the Doctor is officially acquitted. Which is nice, considering the Time Lords basically kidnapped him in the first place.
The story ends with the Doctor wandering off with Mel, declaring he’ll “look into this Valeyard business later,” and the audience wondering how on Gallifrey any of this was supposed to make sense.